taboo, unfiltered, and tired thoughts

It may be taboo, but I’m going to write about it. The number one thing that plagues all guys, which us girls are luckily exempt from. 

Random boners.. Or boners for that matter. I’d like to start off by saying that all guys should never ever be ashamed of a boner. It’s a beautiful thing. We all have body parts that we may be uncomfortable with, and can’t seem to comprehend why the opposite sex finds it attractive. I’ll just list a few… Penises, vaginas, and boobs. These are the main body parts, that without sexualization, may have been viewed neutrally or distastefully. Though, we luckily don’t have to face that kind of a reality. Instead, we live in a world where our private parts are desired by the opposite sex (to touch, not to have.. Typically). Back to boners and their beauty…. Having an erection is like blushing, for those of you guys who don’t blush (because it seems far more common for girls to blush), this is your form of blushing. I’m pretty sure it doesn’t produce the same flush and rush you feel throughout your body when you blush, but it’s not possible for me to ever know…so I’ll just guess it’s not exactly the same feeling. Though, blushing and boners have similar basic components. They’re typically in response to some kind of provocation (so typically your romantic interest/ crush does something that intrigues you/ catches you off guard in a pleasant way). They are both involuntary. Also, they typically show your true feelings, which isn’t always appreciated by the person blushing/ getting an erection. 
An unexpected erection while hugging your crush could cause you embarrassment, but the vulnerability is endearing. Some may see boners as a violation, and that it was somehow the guy’s intent to put a girl in a compromising position by pressing it against her… But in all honesty, if feelings are reciprocated, or the girl finds you attractive, it’s not an unpleasant feeling for her. So when you’re hugging a girl and you get a random boner, don’t pull away, because you may risk her thinking that your disinterested or don’t enjoy touching her. That is, unless she pulls away… In that case, she didn’t want to feel your boner pressed against her… 
But if a girl is flirty with you, enough to the point that you’re getting random erections while hugging her, chances are she wants to be pressed against you, and the boner is just a bonus. 
Sorry if this post makes you feel in any way uncomfortable, I just felt like discussing it, cause I’ve encountered situations too many times where guys are embarrassed of their boners rather than enjoying the energizing feeling of arousal. 

Act like child?

Have you ever looked at two little kids who just hit it off, and happened to not be of the same gender? You can tell that they have what we all call a ‘crush’, but to them it is the simple fact that they just love each others company. Little kids talk to the opposite gender and don’t think twice about it. When you start getting into your pre-teen age, teens, and so forth, it somehow becomes a little nerve racking when you see someone you want to get to know. Your mind immediately picks up on the fact that the person is a crush, the second you find them attractive. But instead of walking up to them right when you want to, you waste time thinking of what to say. The kid version of yourself would’ve just walked right up to the other little girl or boy, and asked if you could play with them…..(the kid kind of play that is). You’ll most likely not even approach that person if they are to good looking, and confident, because you have doubt that they will like you back, in that way. The expectations are set, and it’s far from go time. When I was little, I adored a few little boys in my elementary school class. I talked to each one and didn’t ever think once about the fact that I could have had a crush on one of them. Heck, I didn’t even know what it felt like to have a crush on anybody. Now that I look back on that time, I’m pretty sure I could have had a crush back then; I just didn’t know that maybe, subconsciously, my brain was thinking they were a perfect match if we stayed in touch until an appropriate dating age. I just felt like I was able to be completely me, without feeling the need to impress them. When crushes arise later on in life though, it seems as though we can no longer stay one-hundred percent true to ourselves because we’re always thinking of the next way to impress them, to seem more likable than all the others. Wouldn’t it be interesting if our child like carefree attitude stayed with us through life? Then the teen guys and girls would just talk to each other on the bus with out feeling like they needed to be fake, to be likable. Same with the men and women at clubs, coffee shops, bars, etc. It would just be weird, and unlike a man, to just come up to have a friendly conversation with you without quickly assuming you have to put them in the ‘date or don’t date’ category in your mind. Or say a woman walks up to a man in her high heels and he has to think between whether or not she’s working those high heels, or if she looks like she is going to fall down due to being top heavy, or if she has an over dominating kind of personality that he may not find attractive.

First of all, when you’re younger, the appearance of your peers doesn’t seem to matter because you all know that at that young of an age, your parents were still choosing the outfits you wore. Also, when you’re younger, you don’t dress yourself aiming to appear sexy, you dress as comfortably as you can. Little kids usually only judge each other on whether or not they like the same things, if you both like at least one thing that is the same,  you are then able to qualify into the friend category, as long as neither of you are mean. Although little children don’t have a clue about the dating world, maybe they have the right idea about the approach we should all take towards our opposite gender; Approach them with no label on what you will consider them, and just get to know the person they are before deeming them date-able or not. Also, don’t feel like you should have to put on a show to seem like that extremely likable pushover, if someone does something rude, just tell them in an adult manner, that you didn’t really appreciate it, like how you would do if one of your little peers when you were younger if they stole your toy. You don’t have to be fine with everything, if someone stole that toy that was yours, you wouldn’t have let them just take it without asking, because that’s rude.